Thursday, April 3, 2014

Decide For Yourself

As children we believe what our parents tell us. They teach us right from wrong, they instill their values into us, and most often, we believe what they believe.
But I wonder if we keep that trait as adults. If we blindly believe what other people say to us, taking their opinions as fact.

Throughout my years as an adult, I've fallen so often into the trap of believing things about another person just because a friend shares their opinion with me. Automatically siding with them, or agreeing that they are indeed the "worst" or "best", depending on how my friend thought of them.
Finding out later on that I've missed out on friendships because I was misinformed, or didn't have all the information, or was simply not willing to find out for myself, was a real metaphorical kick to the stomach.


On the playground little girls (or boys) stand together in groups and whisper, and giggle, and other kids join in without any of the information just so they wont be "next".

In more adult relationships, we listen to what our friends closest to us have to say about people and make judgments, sometimes without ever having had a conversation with those people!

What opportunities have been lost! What friendships, what enriching conversations, co-family dinners, our kids being best friends, and on and on and on, have we missed out on because we didn't take the time to decide for ourselves?

I look around at people that I've held at arms length because I've made a decision about them based on what I've heard from someone else. And I'm sad. Sad because I'll never know if I'm missing out on something truly amazing.

So, from now on, I'm vowing to make my own decisions. And I'm challenging you to do the same.
Who's with me?!?!


  1. What a great post. You are right, this happens so often. For many reasons. I am up to the challenge! Thanks for putting it out there.

    1. Yes! *embarrassing excited happy/challenge dance*

  2. Such an amazing concept! A long overdue idea that needs to be shared, far and wide:) Perhaps I could also note, it might not be a terrible idea to even sometimes look past a person's flaws or offensive behavior, and consider the possibility that they are fighting a battle we may know nothing about...a small act of kindness might melt an icy heart...make the first never know how far your kindness will go:) Love your wisdom, MJ!!

    1. I love what you had to add! Brilliant my friend!